It has now been a few weeks after San Diego Comic Con – a much needed recovery time after such a complete sensory overload, and now I can actually look into the big bag of swag that I collected. My bag has the cast of the television show “The Big Bang” and is big enough to carry a Great Dane puppy. Inside are pounds of free magazines, faux tattoos, posters and other things thrust into my hands by silicone-chested muses, or other costumed barkers standing at the various booths.
Looking at my treasures I am struck once more by the nagging thought, “What did I actually do for the four days?” To remedy this quandary, I reflect on the events and the sights and sounds.
The first day is the actual day you go and get your passes that you went online and registered for in March; being a professional, I also have the advantage of going to “Preview Night,” but more on that later. The lines moves rather briskly compared to the regular folks who have been camping over night in the cold and grumbling of the homeless who are mad that their spot has been taken by someone who actually has a home with running water. Once inside you are handed your large bag with the featured show(s), movies of the year blazoned on the side and the event book the size of a small phone directory.
As I said earlier I will be attending Preview Night; this event is not part of the regular convention experience, but for the professionals and their entourage, it is included. The regular folk can attend, but they do have to pay extra for the privilege, much like Governor Brown’s “Fire Protection” scheme. The concept of Preview Night is sort of a convention-lite – less crowds but still fulfilling. It is a 3-hour speed trial of the convention so that attendees can see where all the cool things are so they know where to park their bags and costumed forms for the four days. Also where you will be spending the hard earned cash they have been saving up since last convention to buy stuff that continue to fill up their rooms or apartments. Fun Fact: some attendees save up between $1500 to $3000; think of all the Starbuck’s lattes that would buy.
It is the first day of the actual convention and the hunt for parking begins. Seasoned attendees know that to obtain the best spot you must arrive several hours before the convention opens, say around 5:30 AM-ish is a good time. If you have seen the show MonsterQuest: Search for the Yeti, that was easy compared to the search for parking during the convention. If you have missed the window for good parking then you will be driving around for hours and eventually settling for a spot two cities over, (helpful hint: bring water and plenty of snacks).
The opening of the convention is like the original opening of Ellis Island – with hordes of people from another reality, not another country crammed into the halls and balconies awaiting the opening of the doors. There are Klingons, pirates, overweight Spartans and much, much more and some have actually showered too!
Once the doors have opened and you are pushed along inside it doesn’t look any different than Preview Night except that now there are more people and celebrities! One note should be mentioned that people are much ruder than on Preview Night – reminding me of my vacation in New York City, right down to the strangely dressed people. Now you are caught in the primal lemming urge to follow the person in front of you – all thoughts of the night before are lost in the mass exodus towards the free stuff. I have learned over the twenty-five years I have been attending to follow the largest person I can find and let them cut a path throw the crowd. Never follow a hot babe in costume, they are always stopped for pictures, also don’t follow any costumed person, some didn’t get the shower email.
As you weave in and out of each aisle you are accosted by free stuff and sometimes you stop for something really cool, (I collect old pulp novels from the 1950’s – and I read too). And if you are lucky you find a real treasure and pay five-times its original worth only to learn that if you had waited until the last day of the convention you could’ve gotten for its original price. But hey, its Comic Con and you don’t know if it’ll be there tomorrow!
But Comic Con isn’t just about buying stuff and taking pictures of people dressed up as – whatever, there are also panels and seminars, movie previews with the actors to answer questions and build up their audience base when the film comes out. There are workshops on how to build your own Sandspeeder using things you find at Home Depot, or how to sew up costumes that are guaranteed to win you the awards at the Masquerade on Saturday night. See, it isn’t all just fun and going into debt, there are upsides to this too.
So I have separated my three treasured pulp novels, the autograph from Matt Smith and Karen Gillan from Doctor Who from the large pile of stuff I really don’t want, but the buxom women in the shiny skin tight outfit assured me I really wanted. As I think back on those four days here is what comes to mind:
- Loud noises both human and electronic
- Silicone breasts in spandex
- Lots of stuff I cannot afford but believe I can'tlive without
- Doctor Who fans running wild!
- Natural breasts in corsets
- Rude people hyped on Red Bull
- People living their dream fantasies in a public place
- More breasts
- Celebrities charging for their autograph (you know who they are)
- The fall of modern civilization through video games
- Breasts
Yup, that about covers it. Well, I better fill out my registration for next year – maybe it will be different next year... nah!
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